For a person to succeed in life, to know God and to be happy, he/she should not stay in his past misery from unpleasant memories and bad thoughts. He/she should seek what is best for now (present), so his or her future may be different.
Abu Hurairah said: “The Prophet, peace be upon him, said: ‘The example of a believer is like a fresh tender plant; from whichever direction the wind blows, it bends the plant. But when the wind dies down, it straightens up again. (Similarly a believer is tested by afflictions to strengthen his faith and heart, and he remains patient and firm).And an evil person is like a pine tree which remains hard and stiff until Allah breaks it whenever He wills.” Bukhari Vol. 7 : No. 547
Whether, it’s mentally, physically or emotionally, we all faces challenges in life, it’s part of the process of life that changes who or what we are as an individual. Most people condemn themselves into living a life of unhappiness, because of bad experiences in their lives. These people will talk , think about what happened to them from morning till night, even if something good will come their way they won’t see it. It’s sad enough to know what we went through, it’s also sad to keep thinking about it everyday of our lives.
“God turns you from one feeling to another and teaches by means of opposites, so that you will have two wings to fly, not one.” –Jalal al-Din Muhammad Rumi
The good and bad things in life are both ways to teach us about ourselves, to be a better person. A wise person sees the bad things in life as a gift, it’s how he learn to perfect himself by defeating his Nafs (ego). It’s only after you failed that you know the best way to succeed. To change this pattern or bad habit, we need to change the way we think, the way we look at the world, what happen to us today, doesn’t determine the type of person we will be tomorrow.
” Everything in the universe is within you. Ask all from yourself.” –Jalal al-Din Muhammad Rumi
Happiness is not a destination, it can’t be reach in place somewhere, and no one can give it to us, it can only be achieve by our own selves. If we look at the human body for example, when we get hurt the body automatically heals itsef. In the same way, we should look at each day of our lives as a new opportunity to heal our being to be different.
A Hadith of Rasul (SAW) says:
Whosoever knows himself knows his Lord.”
“man ‘arafa nafsahu faqad ‘arafa Rabbahu”
When all the layers of the Nafs (ego) has been broken down one by one and after struggling through the trials of Allah Subhanahu wa-ta’ala, only then can we know the dept of our ownselves. It’s all possible by the help of the Merciful Allah(swt), “Verily, with every hardship comes ease” (Al Quran, 94:6), “Seek help in patience and prayer” (2:45), “The patient and steadfast, and the truthful and loyal” (3:16); “God loves the patient” (3:145); “and Surely God is with the patient” (2:153).
The Prophet Muhammad (salallahu alaihi wasallam) said, “When something weighs on your conscience, give it up.” [Al-Tirmidhi, Hadith 8]
It’s best not to think of things that will not benefit us or our well beings. When bad things happen, we should seek help with Allah(swt) by having patience and we should always look for the good in everything, it’s only when the mind is at peace can we find the solution.
“Fear Allah wherever you are. Follow up a bad deed with a good deed and it will blot it out. And deal with people in a good manner.” (At-Tirmidhi)